On ‘doormat wives’ and ‘henpecked husbands’

From my childhood, my father used to and still does ridicule me saying "You will be one heck of a henpecked husband and would be a shame for all men in this word". I never paid any attention to that remark till few months ago. I have been thinking why would he say that?

Let me define what a henpecked husband is (according to me, anyways): A husband, who doesn't have high opinion of himself and "takes orders" from his wife on every matter. Would I do that? No, I am too independent and opinionated for being one. I for one, have been known to stand on my point literally in many debates. But, why would My father call me a henpecked one? I started exploring more and got no where, as always.

I was talking to my friend about this, lamenting that I how I am destined to be a henpecked husband, she laughed and went on her trademark extempore lecture on sociological, anthropological aspects of human relationships. She says Henpeckedness is not that bad as it seems, as any man who cares and respects his wife view point would be called henpecked. Makes sense, at least to me, where the society (at least Indian one, and may be not American one to a lesser extent) expects and calls the husband "the man of the house" and this statement says everything. He takes the decision, he has the final word. If dares to consult his wife in anything, that's it! He will be branded and paraded in the main street, With all cackling sounds and a chicken dance and all that jazz thrown in.

Coming to why my dad calls me one is, he thinks that I am a pansy around women and doesn't voice my opinion enough. I disgree though, may be women make more sense.

Coming to Doormat wives, which I think is very derogatory term by itself, I think women are to be blamed themselves. If a woman has sense of self-worth and self-esteem, she would never end up being a doormat. I grew up in a household with strong women and they know how to earn respect not only from their man but everyone in their household. Remember women, respect is never given, it's hard earned. This, I think is very cyclical process, women growing up in the shadow of strong women end up strong and make their daughters stronger and the cycle goes on. Personally, I can never stand a anyone who lacks confidence and can't carry themselves.

Well, I do have my chicken costume ready and I am certified by my dad that I can be pecked away to glory, any takers?